If you try to get rid of fear and anger without knowing their meaning, they will grow stronger and return. – Dr. Deepak Chopra.
We are not just told by others, we somehow know that fear and anger are not qualities to possess happily. So we try to suppress, burry, ignore or act contrary to them. For example, we deliberately act bravely to disguise our fears. But, all these ways do not really help in getting rid of fear and anger.
Knowing these feelings, understanding the causes underlying them, and most importantly owning them is essential to their healing. Some people do accept their fears and anger. But, most of us repudiate them. As a result, we project it outside of us. We notice fear and anger in people around us more often than we consciously know. It is a natural response of the mind.
If we know our fear and anger and do not disown them, we will hardly notice it in others. Acceptance is the first step to healing and overcoming them; understanding is the second. Fear and anger are two faces of the same emotions. They generate two responses – fight or flight. We know about these instinctive reactions. But, still cannot accept our emotions.
The antidote or cure for fear and anger is Love. Self love is the best healer. Accepting yourself as you are and loving yourself despite any quality or trait you dislike in yourself, helps in healing them. Cursing yourself would be of little help.
Try this: Think of a quality or trait you do not deny in yourself. Now try to recollect if you ever noticed it in others. You will be amazed to know that you do not project it outside. This experiment will provide greater insights.
Love, Joy, Peace
Counsellor and Life Coach